If I were Jimmy the Greek...

...well, I would have watched my mouth for one thing. But, in the spirit of poor prognostication, I offer my picks for the weekend...

Metros Host Fire: NY/NJ looking for their first win. They get it, 2-1.
FC Dallas Hosts ReAL: Did you see the MLS record for "Most Humorous Caution Issued" to Clint Mathis? It was high-lair-ee-us. FC Dallas coasts, 2-0.
Rapids Host Crew: Man, this could be an interesting game. The Crew is erratic in terms of scoring potential, and I still believe in a certain keeper. Another upset, Rapids: 2-1.
Galaxy Hosts Chivas: Chivas needs a win. They'll only get it in the stands, and a sloppy game will end 1-1.
San Jose Hosts The Wiz: You know, the Washington Wizards are in the playoffs. That's kinda cool. Which means that according to the laws of conversation of suckage, KC falls flat. San Jose wins 3-1. There is grumbling about Bo.
United Hosts the Revs: I was at RFK for the Conference Final. I'm told it was the greatest game in MLS history. I'm not sure, since I was feeling so nervous I was sick from about the 50th minute. United needs a win, and I believe. 1-0.

Very Late Update [11 May]
So how did I do?
3-3 ... Not particulary well.