Yearbook Confidential

Let me see if I can capture the situation properly... Think back to when you were in college. If that doesn't work, try high school... say, some point in your life when social interactions were blown way out of proportion. Good.

Now, let's say you have a friendly rivalry with someone, call him, I dunno, Steve. You and Steve have similar interests. Perhaps you both play ultimate, or are on the same Improv Comedy Troupe, or archery, or whatever. Regardless, you sort of have this competitive thing with Steve, and it's the kind of thing where you are trying to top each other's accomplishments just to see how things will go. Maybe a few times it escalates to the point where you say a few nasty words to each other, but for the most part it's just good, fun competition, and people around you even notice that it is pretty cool.

Only there's this other guy. We'll call him Will. Will sees the banter between you and Steve, and thinks that's how he's going to be as cool as you and Steve are. So he starts trying to join in. It's kind of pathetic, but whatever. You and Steve keep doing your thing, and Will snipes from the sidelines. It's a minor annoyance, and you and Steve are still pushing each other to be better.

Only suddenly, Will decides to announce on some internet newsgroup that he's tired of the disrespect you and Steve have for him. He claims that you two are both jealous, and he hates you both. He implies that you and Steve are too much of a clique (despite that fact that you rarely hang out together, outside of the common interest) and that he's promoting a new way of doing things. He tells everyone how much he can't stand you and Steve, and how only he sees things for how they should be. You and Steve are like "What's up with this guy? Whoa. Seriosly... a bit wacked out..."

Okay, got all that? Now substitute Columbus Crew for Will, any other conference team or Steve (or the LA Galaxy), and you can get a sense for how bewildering their reaction to DC is for me.