Wednesday International Coffee from... What was that waiter's name?

UNITED OPEN AGAINST WIZ: Goff has the scoop yesterday, I think, but it hits the main pages of the Post today. United open on the road March 29 against Kansas City, and then the home opener is against Toronto. No, it is not too early to begin speculating about how many points United should get out of those games. But... man, March... that's like four months away. Oh, my head is hurting. Now, when are those CONCACAF Cup games going to be?

CONGRATULATIONS TO CELTIC, NOW QUIT BORING ME: Good to watch Celtic advance into the round of 16 again in the Champion's League, but what a dreary game that was. Celtic looked very pedestrian in their attack, what there was of it, and Milan looked positively disinterested for most of an hour. I'm sure our friends over at Lord of the Wing will call it as they see it once they talk about the match...

HEED ARMY IN TACTICAL RETREAT: It's been far too long since we checked in with our friends in Gateshead, and sadly the news is not good. The official Unibond Premier Division team of the DCenters has dropped three matches straight. That being said, the strong early season start still has them at fourth in the table, and there's time and matches for the points to be made up. Still, the HeedArmy is invoking language that sounds perilously close to "Fight for the Shirt!":

In all the game was there for Gateshead to take, yet we showed the fight of a Buddhist monk at prey time. If the Heed really count themselves as one of the teams that can gain promotion from the UniBond some fight and heart need to be injected in to the players.

C'mon HEED, step it up!